Understanding the roots of addiction and finding a way forward.
Addiction and compulsive behaviours can take many forms—substance use, sexual compulsivity, or patterns of control and perfectionism—and often stem from deeper emotional pain or unresolved trauma. Therapy provides a safe, non-judgmental space to explore these underlying issues, understand the behaviours, and develop healthier ways of coping. My approach is integrative and trauma-informed, combining evidence-based techniques to support lasting change, emotional regulation, and personal growth.
ADDICTION & COMPULSION
I have a wide range of experience, but my speciality is in the continuum of addiction, compulsivity or the various forms of striving, perfection, reward or control that manifest in people’s lives. I work directly with individuals who have concerns around their substance or alcohol use or process addictions such as food, gambling, sex or other compulsive behaviours that control or limit aspects of day-to-day existence. Trapped in a cycle of anticipation, exhilaration, fear, shame and isolation compulsive behaviours routinely conceal a history of unconscious trauma, which in part explains why clients continue repeating behaviours that are potentially damaging or restricting. Labels are a useful shorthand to explain a construct such as addiction but can limit an individuals development I clarify issues in a way that is non-judgmental and down to earth remaining empathetic and respectful of each client’s condition. Bespoke integrated treatments, include trauma therapy, psycho-education, somatic regulation and EMDR. I encourage self-monitoring to recognise disordered thoughts and behaviours and emotional regulation techniques to reduce anxiety.
Working through underlying traumas and negative core beliefs I explore factors which keep behaviour entrenched and provide strategies to challenge them. A robust relapse prevention plan assists clients in managing cravings, leading to sustained behavioural change; allowing clients reconnect with inner resources, to begin to build on their strengths and let go of behaviours that no longer serve them.
Unconscious trauma often underlies compulsive behaviour. In addiction, complex trauma relates to relational damage and emergent core beliefs grounded in childhood, which impact behaviour and life choices.
COMPLUSIVE SEXUAL BEHAVIOUR
I work with individuals and couples; focusing on the sex addict, the partner of the addict and how a couple can reconnect and move forward from the betrayal and pain of addiction. Working through a program of tasks, together we clarify aspects of life that are problematic and confusing and challenge self-defeating behaviours.
Partners of sex addicts experience relational trauma, describing the shock, confusion, humiliation and anger that accompany the realisation that their significant other betrayed. Working with partners I seek to validate the trauma, to support you in processing the traumatic emotional states and to help you understand and reframe the addiction. I provide a program for Sexual and Trauma Recovery.
I am a CSAT trained sexual addiction therapist; a rigorous training that provides expertise and tools in tackling addiction. Sexual Addiction is the umbrella term used to describe the different number of compulsive sexual behaviours including but not limited to multiple sexual partners, pornography addiction, paying for sex, voyeurism, as well as online infidelity and cyber sex.
SEX ADDICTION
Sexual desires and urges are a normal and healthy part of life. For most people, these behaviours don’t cause any serious problems. But some people are unable to control these urges and actions, despite the difficulties they may cause in their relationships, finances and professional lives. But in the case of sex addiction, these urges become overwhelming and the resultant decisions and actions can be extremely destructive. Some people may also use sex and sexual activity to numb any negative emotions and difficult experiences. This can have a negative effect on the person’s quality of life and on those around them.
I provide a program for Sexual and Trauma Recovery; this is a structured integrated treatment for individuals suffering from sexual addiction/compulsivity, which tackles the behaviour and explores the underlying trauma.
TRAUMA
Unconscious trauma often underlies compulsive behaviour. Trauma is a response to severely distressing event/s, resulting of an overwhelming amount of stress that exceeds one’s ability to cope, or integrate the emotions involved with that experience. In addiction terms trauma often relates to relational damage and emergent core beliefs.
PARTNERS
Many partners of sex addicts experience relational trauma, describing feelings of shock, confusion, humiliation and anger that accompany the realization that their significant other betrayed them on an intimate level. Working with partners I seek to validate the trauma, to support you in processing the traumatic emotional states and to help you understand and reframe the addiction.
LOVE ADDICTION
The symptoms of love addiction are largely focused around unhealthy dependency within relationships. These include, self-neglect and distorted thoughts, feelings and behaviour around love and fantasies and relationships. Most love addicts fall in love very quickly but find it difficult coping with a long-term relationship, experiencing a crashing painful disappointment when relationships end. In therapy we work together to unpick relationships, fantasy and co-dependency.
PORNOGRAPHY & CYBERSEX
Compulsive behaviours, including watching porn to excess and cybersex, are increasingly common. Excessive porn use or cruising cybersex sites can negatively impact relationships and limit personal functioning. In 2014, a Cambridge University study found that pornography triggers brain activity in sex addicts similar to how drugs effect drug addicts. The technology provides opportunity and is designed to continuously stimulate a state of arousal and this, rather than trauma can be at the root of the addiction. I provide therapy and a task program to address compulsive pornography use.